Michele Bachmann Wants to Take the Philistines Down

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Michele “I Heart Slavery” Bachmann deserves to be satirized and thrown under the bus. So, I ain’t mad at OnKneesForJesus for getting the “wet” or “white” controversy rolling.

Whether  “wet” or “white,” what remains is Michele’s preaching about how Jonathan and his “compatriot soldier took the entire [Philistine] army down.”

What is a Philistine? The non-biblical meaning is a person who has no understanding of and is hostile to culture and the arts. Of course, Bachmann would never apply that meaning to herself.

You might be a modern-day Philistine if you believe that:

  • The world was not created in six days with one day reserved as a rest day for some mythical god.
  • A guy named Jesus did not die for your sins.
  • Global warming is not a plot concocted by climate scientists.
  • Reproductive rights are essential and that Roe is settled law.
  • Women should never submit to men
  • Marriage is not a “special right,” reserved for heterosexuals.
  • “Man” does not have dominion over the Earth
  • Coal kills.

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